Beauty isn't only on the outside its also on the in. To feel beautiful you have to be happy being you and love yourself.
I used to hate who I was and hate and want to change myself. I'll always remember being called the least prettiest, and I'll always remember hurtful words of being called ugly. I didn't take much time on my appearance in the morning when I went to school. I hardly had any friends because I was very shy and I was and still to this day am battling my social anxiety. Since I was battling with my social anxiety I wasn't happy at all and I was very depressed. Depressed I wasn't out having fun with friends going to parties, etc. Even if I ever did get invited to party, I would have panic attacks even thinking about going because of the thought of being around people I don't know and how I may make a fool of myself. So usually I just denied invitation. Then in return I'd be hurt because of my actions because whenever I had a b-day party, people would say "You never went to my party" and not come to mine because of that fact. I understand that I didn't go to your party and I'm truly sorry from the bottom of my heart, social anxiety has made me go through a lot of pain through my life especially with fact of me doing anything social gatherings. It hurts when you can see others out there having fun and here I am sitting in my house every day.
My social anxiety has also caused a problem for being true to myself. I love to dress rebellious (black t-shirts, different color hair, piercings, tattoos,etc.) it is just my style, just because I dress that way doesn't mean I am a bad person. I am a very sensitive caring girl, I deeply care about everyone, I never like people being unhappy or angry. Yes I do have my faults but I know I am a nice caring person. I have a heart, I'm not some emotionless soul that doesn't have feelings. I plan on in my future to donate as much money as I can to charities and a lot of animal shelters. So you should never try to judge someone because of the way that they dress. When I dress that way I love to dress I always feel like there is eyes on me and having social anxiety it doesn't go very good. I at one time stop dressing the way I love because of people.
Luckily I have finally came to relation that why should I care about what people think of me? If they want to judge me by my appearance and not even know what I''m like, go ahead. I'm not going to get upset about anymore. I'm going to be happy being myself. I'm not going to waste my life and be unhappy for not being myself when I only have one life to live.
One thing that I've seen with quite a few people is that they try to be like someone they are not. They try to act and like the same things that their friends like to be happy with themselves because they look up to that person. Stop. For one thing you are being a copy cat and I'm not going to lie it can get annoying. You need to be yourself, you need to like the stuff that you like yourself! Sure you can be inspired by someone, but you don't need to live in their shadow and try and be like them to be happy.
- Here is an example
Say your best friend loves heavy metal music and you look up to her. You think she's an awesome person and beautiful. If you don't care for metal music and more of a pop or country type of person don't change yourself just to be like them and try to feel like you fit in. Be you, not them. Don't think they will stop being your friend if you have different interests or different taste in style. Don't think that is the way for you to fit in! Your not being true to yourself your more less being a poser. I think it is important to be yourself to be happy.Your just trying to fool yourself that your happy when trying to be like someone else.
- Another example
Say your best friend is going through a change in trying to find them self. If your friend dresses in name brand clothing now instead of their usual attire doesn't mean you have to do the same thing. You don't have to be like them. Be you! Wear the clothing that makes you feel good! Don't dress to impress your friends, dress to impress yourself!
If you be yourself you will be so much more happier. Don't try to impress people. Be you! Not someone else! Your life will be so much better!
Till next time
xoxox Lacey
